As most of you know school is getting ready to start or has started for most already!!! Soooo out of the kindness of my heart and experience, i've decided to share some tips on how to make college life a little less stressful =D

1) Play Childish Games:
Play games that were fun when you were 5, like Dodge Ball, Four Square, Duck, Duck, Goose, or Freeze Tag are great ice breakers. If you and a handful of brave friends get together in the very center of your institution of higher learning with a big rubber ball and started playing four square, you'd be amazed at how cool people will think you are. People will want to play with you, and they'll gush with happiness about fond childhood memories that you've inspired. And come on...what better way is there to relieve the stress of finals than smashing your roommate's face in with an oversized rubber ball, and having the poor sucker laugh with joy and practically thank you for doing it? If you think playing ultimate frisbee counts, then maybe you're missing my point.

2) Modify Your Appearance:
Dye your hair odd colors. Wear t-shirts with inane, meaningless sayings. Experiment with different types of facial hair; grow a goatee for a few weeks, try extra long sideburns, try just not shaving at all. If you're a girl, stop shaving your armpits and legs for a little while. Or if you're a guy, start shaving your legs and armpits for a little while.
Let your hair go wild for a while, too. Stop combing and styling it in the mornings.
Aside from appearing like a cool person who doesn't fall prey to superficial standards of physical beauty, thus attracting all of those foolish young girls who write cheesy poetry and think anybody who takes a philosophy class must be deep, these tips are also practical. You can trade valuable grooming time for extra sleep, which is the next best thing to money and sex.

3) Be Fickle About Your Major:
People will be tricked into thinking you're a cool, free spirited person if you experiment with a few majors, or go undeclared for a few terms. They won't think you're a fickle kid wasting mommy and daddy's money; rather, they'll be impressed that you continue to evolve as a person and that you don't select your future hastily.
Just don't blow the whole thing by bragging about it. Or by whining about the difficulty of your decisions. You want to give the impression that your sudden change in majors from Astrophysics to Psychology is based on an epiphany that you won't be a complete human being until you've improved your understanding of the human mind. Noone can learn the truth that you really changed majors because you don't know jack shit about math, and you kept flunking the classes in your original major.

4) Play Well With Others:
When you realize that SOME(not all) the cute girls you want to have sex with are really airheaded bimbos, don't tell them that. Just nod along and say "Wow, that's so cool! I totally know what you mean!" when they tell you their excuse for changing their majors from Astrophysics to Psychology. You need sex to survive college, and you won't get any if you don't fall for these stupid tricks when they try them on you.

I once had a roommate who had the uncanny knack of destroying conversations with a single blow. During a normal, healthy discussion of pornography he interjected a question like he was trying to change the subject to something he'd been thinking about all day:

"You guys ever hear of couch fucking?"

Three faces stare back at him, not really able to comprehend why he had just asked that.

"You know, it's where you cut a hole in a piece of furniture and just, kind of, go at it."

Somebody coughed. "No, Joe. We haven't heard of couch fucking." Three people turned in unison and made their way to other rooms in the apartment.

Personally, I think he just wanted the living room to himself, and I'm not sure I want to know why.